Thursday, January 07, 2010

Undetectable

Yesterday I received my latest PCR test results. Fortunately, they continue to be undetectable or PCRU for those who know CML jargon. What was funny was that I had forgotten to call to get the results until my CML buddy, Wanda, reminded me. Thanks Wanda!

I started thinking that this whole thing has become so normal to me and really an after thought. That is quite different than it was almost 4 years ago where I would dwell on every number or any symptom. I would spend time reading about CML, looking at the message boards, and communicating with others about this topic. Now, it hardly comes up at all. The reality is that I don't really think about it all that much.

The only time it is a reality is when I go to the hospital. This past visit, I went for a routine blood test on a Saturday. The blood lab is not open at Dana-Farber on Saturday so they sent me to the infusion room. I was sitting around with many people who were getting chemotherapy and possibly spending the day there. I really felt out of place. I do have to return in February for a 6-month follow up.

CML has certainly changed over the course of my diagnosis. It has gone from a primary stressor at the beginning, to some background noise every so often. Let's hope it stays that way. Perhaps one day I will be able to say, I used to have CML.